Aaron Lizardo

The Monster Inside

There is almost no hope for what’s inside of me,

No one knows how these feelings will turn out to be.

All the emotions locked inside,

I don’t want to hurt the ones beside.

Anger and hatred are the emotion dealing.

There is no way to escape these dwelling feelings,

I am falling apart inside my head,

It doesn’t matter; soon everything will be dead.

I can’t pretend none of this is real

There is almost nothing else to feel.

All this sadness and menacing pain,

Causes all my happiness to go down the drain.

May 1, 2012

“Little thinks’t thou that it will free anon,

and that I shall tomorrow find thee

fall’n, or not at all.” – John Donne

Dreams and hopes forgotten,

Has everything gone rotten?

Shall there be no more fight?

Do thou not see what’s in sight?

What thinks’t thee?

That soon you shall be free?

Thou art sadly mistaken,

Thoughts must be forsaken.

Life is very cruel,

Thou must be a fool,

For believing in such a fairytale.

Thou art destined to fail.

What thou shall receive,

Is nothing but deceive.

Jan 17, 2012

Tony, the Worthy.

Once upon a time there was a little kid. Who was an outsider. He didn’t have any friends and his mother died when she gave birth to him. His dad changed when he lost his wife. He used to be a nice guy; he never drank excessively, or had problems with his temper, and never ever struck his family members. But all that changed, now he’s an angry alcoholic who beats his kid.The little kid’s name is Tony, he is 7 years old. And at a very young age, he has experienced a lot. How would you feel to live with a father that was now a drunk and beat you up almost every day? On a good day he would get a decent meal to eat. His dad being a drunk, he had trouble sticking with keep a job down and in today’s economy that’s not enough to support yourself let alone a child. If only Tony’s mother was still alive, many things would be better. Since his dad didn’t love him and his aunts and uncles stayed away because of the father, Tony received no love at all. He considered himself an unwanted orphan. Without love, why keep on living, that’s what was on Tony’s mind all day long. You can’t even imagine how empty and abandoned he felt. How sad and joyless his life was, remember he is only 7yrs. old. He was treated as worthless; thus, he soon believed he was worthless. At school it was tough for him. He was malnourished, so he was scrawny and the kids seized the opportunity to pick on him. They called him “Tony the Tiny.” Tony was indeed different form the other kids, he also possessed a special gift, he was extraordinarily intelligent. He was smart so his thoughts were deep and depressing. Darkness and despair was all that filled his mind. He didn’t want to keep going forward because he thought he was a worthless human being destined only for failure. With no love felt since birth, there was no pint to life at all. To escape his dad, he visited his public local library. He read many, many books and absorbed the information like no other. One day he came upon the book The Gospel of Wealth by Andrew Carnegie. He read the book without any intention of changing his life. But one quote stuck to him “help the ones that help themselves”. No wonder anyone ever cared to help him in his time of need. That single quote inspired him to keep moving forward. If he worked hard enough, he would be successful because he was going to prove to himself he is worthy of Being Alive…


April 24, 2012

Selling Fruit and Cheese

      When I stopped by the first house I saw many disturbing things. They still had Christmas decorations but it was the middle of April. The decorations were all so hideous and disgusting. They had a reindeer that was half melted from the bottom up so that it looked like it was floating in midair. The next thing that caught my eyes was that their Frosty the Snowman had one of the most evil and terrorizing looks on its face. This place just gave me the creeps. The grass was another issue; it hadn’t been cut in what seems like decades. Who knows what might be lurking in there. All these decorations in what seemed like a jungle made me think twice about setting foot upon this place. But, who ever lived in there was a potential customer and money was all that mattered at the moment. So I mustered up all the courage I had and went to the door. And when I pressed the door bell, some of the most menacing sounds came from all the Christmas decorations. Some were laughing in such a low pitch voice that fear began to engulf my body. I had the urge to run away! Then I heard the sound of the door opening. I almost soiled myself. The door opened slowly and I only saw shadows which made everything seem bigger and scarier than it truly is. All of a sudden I realize something that made me feel like an idiot. What I thought to be was a monster, turned out to be one of the most innocent looking little old ladies of all time! I felt so foolish to be tricked by the old timer’s house. It was obvious that she had no strength to take care of her lawn and that she had no one to help her out. That’s why
the house was such a mess, giving reason behind the horrible scene portrayed by the house. When I was about to offer her my fruit and cheese, the old lady grabbed my hand and pulled me into her house with such unnatural, incredible strength. Fear filled my body again when I saw what was inside the house. At that point I knew I was a goner…

Arpril 18, 2012

Little Boy

        My mom would call me to go to the park with her all the time. It was getting kind of annoying because I had other things to take care of like work. She would call me at work just to ask if I could go with her to the park. And when I tell her that I can’t just get off of work, she usually says “oh well, maybe next time.” Then she calls back around twenty minutes later. It gets kind of annoying at times. Luckily I am the head manager of the company I work for, so I don’t get into trouble when she calls all the time.
        The reason my mom likes going to the park all the time is because my father and her went there all the time. My father died two decades ago because some punk thought it would be funny to blow up our mailbox. One morning my father woke up and started the day as usual as can be. But when he went to go get the mail, there was an explosion and it launched parts of shrapnel right into his lungs and heart.  To make it worse, it was my fifteenth birthday. Him and I were going to have a blast, we were going to a baseball game,  then to an actual UFC match. It was going to be the best day ever. But on that day someone dear to my mother and I was taken away. When my father went to go get the mail, and it was over in a couple of minutes. With his last breath he told my mother that he loved her. At that moment my mother lost it and became obsessed with going to the park because that’s where my father first said he loved her to my mother.
        One day when my mother and I were at the park, we saw a little boy sleeping on a park bench. We thought he was just too tired to keep on playing in the park. My mother and I didn’t find any wrong in it what so ever so we left him alone.  But after a couple of weeks of seeing the little boy on the bench over and over again, rose suspicion in us. The little boy seemed to be getting weaker and weaker by the day. You could see he was also getting more and more filthy. So my mother decided to ask the boy what he was up to, and why he was always at the park. The little boy said that he is not doing this on purpose, and that he no longer has a home to live in.  His father went away when he was born and his mother recently passed away. He did not want to go to an orphanage so he ran away. Now he sleeps on the bench and has a donut for dinner every day because the local bakery man is nice to him.
My mother started to cry when she heard what the boy had said. She told me she wanted to adopt the boy. I told my mother that it was not a good idea because she could bearly take care of herself. We should contact the authorities and say that we have found a missing child and forget we ever met him. She didn’t like the idea at all so she convinced me to take him home just for tonight.
I told my mother over and over not to adopt the little boy but it did nothing to stop her. I was getting more stressed than usual because of my mother. She wanted me to not only take care of her but to also take care of the little boy as well. All this stress build up was bad for me so I took a shower. Something unusual happened after the shower. When I looked in the mirror I saw myself as little kid. All the memories of me crying myself to sleep because I no longer had father came back in a rush. It made me think of how the little boy must feel because he no longer has a father nor a mother. At that moment, I knew what I had to do. The next day, the boy had now had a place in my family.